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Pigeon Post: 48 second read, by Farriz Mashudi 19/06/2020

P1:       Time we did something, ourselves? Enough of this flapping about?

P2:       True, the Statues were ours too.

P1:       People built them, yes… But it was us that kept those lone men company on their pedestals, day and night. AND we kept them warm with our regular deliveries. Don’t we have a say in this?

P2:       Can’t make heads or tails of it. First, spikes to hurt our feet, then slippery oils and chemicals to keep us away. Remember that falcon brought in to do their culling?

P1:       Beastly show. If they don’t want us roosting, why leave so many goodies about, lying on the ground?

P2:       And what do we make of the discrimination? Why are pigeons being singled out? Does all this anger apply to Statues only, or to Squares, Circuses and Poles, as well?

P1:       A Statue to the Unknown Pigeon, that’s what we need.

P2:       And dedicated pigeon toilets and bird baths in all public places and landmarks — with or without tourists. Absolutely unhygienic how we’ve been treated.

P1:       Quite right. Ready for despatch then? Let’s show them what we think.

* Photo by Harrison Haines on

For an avian species that make an arguably more worthy contribution to our lives, see No Clucking Matter: The Grumpy Naturalist 19/06/2020

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